Winding down 2019

I've been reflecting on how everything we looked forward to this year is over.

It either happened, like the trip north to go to the wedding, and a lovely Christmas Eve party... or it didn't, like the concert in Colorado, where we lost our free lodgings, so couldn't go (and I ended up having an MRI that day anyway), and the Thanksgiving trip.

New Year's Eve is basically a bust, because I have my first Cycle 2 treatment that day.

We will make the most of it, but I can't have champagne, and I probably won't be able to stay awake to ring in 2020.

I really want to, though.

It's a symbolic gateway into what I hope will be a MUCH better year.

I am hoping that the only huge expenses next year will be my medical bills.  We've already replaced the washer, the dish washer, and the tires, and had unexpected plumping repairs.  The dryer has started to make some squeaking noises, and Dave is certain that it is about to die, but dryers aren't quite as costly as washers.

So he says.

Maybe next year we can stop having to watch every penny, in order to try to recover from all of these hits.  Maybe next year, we can start to put a few dollars aside again.

Maybe next year, I will get good news from my doctor.

Sigh.

The end of this year has seen me feeling discouraged, depressed, and a little bit hopeless.  I need to cut that out, and take up my shield and sword again.

A despondent warrior will not win.

One thing that's actually helping (quite a bit) is that the person at work who stirs up the most negativity and bad morale is off for several weeks for a surgery she had.

Aside:  She's the one who threw away the rubber chicken I took to the office (to try to boost morale), because she was mad at me.
What did I DO to her?? 
I asked her to ASK to use my printer while I am printing refund checks, which I do every afternoon for three weeks out of the month.
She has access to a printer at her end of the office, but she, alone, refuses to use it.
Everyone else in the office, including our manager, asks me before they set up to access my printer, but SHE doesn't think SHE should have to.
One day it came down to her actually arguing with me about it, stating that she shouldn't have to comply with my request.
She got so mad at me for asking her to respect my job's process that she didn't speak to me for a week (which was actually delightful), and threw away a piece of my personal property!
This is the childish bullshit I have to deal with every day at work....but for a few weeks, there will be peace in the office.
And, Yes, my manager knows all about this stupid situation.  I wish she would ask IT to take access to my printer away from that person.
Remember the Lysol story?  The person who sprayed the Lysol acts COMPLETELY differently when this instigator isn't there.  Lysol Laura has made amends with me, apologized profusely, and we are on good terms again.
This is probably because the queen of drama and negativity is her office BFF, and she's out of the office for now!

Anyway.....

We got finished with putting away all of the holiday decorations yesterday.
I usually like to get it all done before the end of the day on Dec. 26th, in memory of my mom dying on Christmas night 1996, but didn't make it this year.

We got started taking stuff down on 12/25, but we went to see the new Star Wars movie, and didn't anticipate that it would take most of our afternoon.  Between the travel to the theater, getting there early, and a 3 hour movie, we were gone for 4 hours that day!

Dave worked on taking some of it down, and packing it up, while he was home Thursday, but we didn't get to the tree until yesterday.

In other news, we are making progress with the kitten.

Because Dave was off work all this past week, Frank got to spend much more time out in the bigger part of the house, with the other cats.

Yesterday, he was out almost all day, and even had time near Annabel that did not elicit growls and hisses from her!!  He seems to understand her status, and laid himself near her, holding perfectly still, for several minutes.

There is a lot less "dangerous" play between Frank and Pete, as Pete is starting to learn that Frank really isn't going to hurt him, and is really much smaller than he is.

Any time things seem to be getting too rough, we shout out "PETE!" and he disengages.  He's a very good boy, and a very smart cat.

Frank is eating like a champ, and is visibly growing.  We haven't tried to check his weight yet, but it's clear that he is doing what he's supposed to do!

After showers, we are on our way to go see Pop and take him a holiday gift sent by his half sister.

There's nothing else on our agenda for today, so that will be nice.  Happy Sunday Funday!!

EDIT: Well, now there's a new agenda item, HAHA!

When we went to see Pop, we stopped at Costco to see if they had any holiday stuff on sale (in particular, a fabric case for the tree), and they did not. 

HOWEVER, we found a piece of furniture to replace our broken couch! 

Yes, we have been living with a broken couch for quite some time.  One of the supports inside of it cracked a few years ago, when a large friend sat on it.

Then, that cracked support gave way entirely during an exciting episode of Game of Thrones, HAHA!  (Dave got a little over excited, and BAM.... broken couch.)

We've just been dealing with a broken down, cheap couch all this time.

The thing we found at Coscto is a little smaller, folds out like a futon, or reclines back one side at a time, has a built-in power outlet and USB charging ports, and is sturdy leather instead of fabric!

It's also HIGHLY affordable!!

SO, Eric and Dave are on their way to go buy it.  Costco only had 5 in stock, so it had to be today.

No more cat barf stains, no more torn corners, no more sagging armrests, no more broken internal support. 

We had hoped to get something after our tax refund came in the spring, but this was now or never, and it's perfect for our needs.  YAY!

Yuletide blessings

Last night's Yule / Winter Solstice celebration was lovely!  I roasted Cornish game hens, stuffed with garlic and home grown sage, along with some carrots.

Dessert is shown above.  Medieval style honey cakes, and real wassail!

Here's the whole table, when dinner was served...

I really want some forged silverware, to complete the medieval look!  I know where I can get some, it's just a matter of ordering it-- and PAYING for it, HAHA!

The pewter plates, and pottery goblets, from the estate sale this past summer are PERFECT!
A lovely friend sent me the napkin rings just in time for dinner!  They match the plates exactly!
(she also sent the holly table runner last year! Robina, you were with us!!)

I woke up at 4 this morning with leg cramps, and never really went back to sleep, so I got up at 7 and made coffee.  We had reheated honey cakes with our coffee, and greeted the sunrise!

This past week has been interesting.

Little Tiny was lethargic (all he wanted to do was cuddle, he stopped playing), and stopped eating, and had to go back to the shelter vet.

We were afraid we were going to lose him!  He lost half of his body weight in 2 days of eating little to nothing!!  We tried everything we could think of, and he gradually stopped altogether.

They said he had an upper respiratory infection (they called it kennel cough) that was bad enough that he couldn't smell his food.

All we noticed was that he sneezed once in a while, and had a tiny bit of nasal crust, but apparently, it was worse than it looked!

They didn't tell us what they did for him, but he was at the shelter all day, and we picked up a fully revived kitten!  My guess is they gave him a steroid injection.  We also have antibiotics to administer at home.  He was fine with it at first, but today, he really fought it!

Friends had recommended a specific brand of food (one of them called it "kitten crack"), so we went out in search of it after we picked him up, but didn't find any on the way home from the shelter. 

That night, we fed him his kibble and some of our grown up cats' food, and he gobbled it up.

We found the recommended food the next day, and he has been eating like a champ!

He's put his weight back on, and is a normal, active, playful kitten!  No more lethargy!  But also no more cuddling..... I miss that, and hope to see it return!

We introduced him to the other cats Thursday and Friday nights, and he has been out free in the house when we are home.. and awake.  He and Dave still stay in the guest room at night, with the door shut.

He and Pete get along great, but Annabel is still upset.  At first, she was hiding, but now she stays out and just growls at him.

Poor babygirl. I knew she'd be unhappy.  I hope it wears off soon!!

He's VERY fast, and VERY small, so we have to really watch out for him.  Dave stepped on him once already, and he shot out of the front door once, too. EEK!!

He has NO fear, and chases big Pete all around the house.  Pete is getting a lot of exercise!

We had a long list of names for Little Tiny, but since this was Dave's idea, I let him choose.

He chose Franklin.

There's a Grateful Dead song called "Franklin's Tower,"  and one of the lyrics is "May the four winds blow you safely home."

Our little kitten was at death's door, one way or another  (being a black kitten up for free adoption in a cruel world, and then getting alarmingly sick alarmingly quickly), and we saved him.

He now has a home, and if Annabel doesn't kill him, he'll be safe and loved!

I had my third treatment on Tuesday.  My nurse called, and my blood counts are a bit concerning, so I am taking some extra steps to raise my potassium levels (no wonder I have been having so many leg cramps!), and to encourage my body to produce platelets.

A couple of liver enzymes are too high, which can happen with chemo, so I am not allowed to drink hard liquor.  She said a little wine or beer are okay, which is all I have been having since we started anyway.

Nurse said I SHOULD recover well over this week off.

I will have  my labs drawn on Friday, so that the results will get to Doc on Monday.  If things are still bad, I may not start cycle 2 on New Year's Eve.

We'll see.

I've been pretty fatigued, but I am also not sleeping well, probably due to low potassium and leg cramps!

I was taking potassium supplements already (for years), but it's not doing the trick, so I am eating bananas, which I don't like, and drinking orange juice, which is super high in sugar, drinking V8, and eating miso soup, and sweet potatoes, and making electrolyte enhanced water, and staying hydrated....

Another reason I don't sleep is that I have to get up to pee so often!

I can't do the keto diet, AND consume all of the stuff I need to eat to raise potassium, so my hydration process is less efficient, and I pee a lot more.

When I was fully adapted to low carb/keto, my water metabolism was GREAT!  I drank my 8 glasses a day, and didn't have to pee every 20 minutes!

Sigh.

(FYI the low carb/keto lifestyle is touted as being anti-cancer-- but my cancer came back during the year I was experimenting with keto, so I have nothing more to say on that subject!  However,  I felt great, I wasn't retaining water, and I lost just enough weight to feel good in my clothes again.)

My office decided to close tomorrow for a software update, so I got to take that vacation day back, but either way, I am glad to be off for 5 days.   I can take naps!

Today, we don't have any plans except to maybe go to some of the local antique stores.  Dave wants a new-to-us butter dish.

Then, once back home, we will start preparing the house for Christmas Eve company.

OH, and Eric has contacted me, and is taking me ... just me... out for dinner tomorrow.  Should be interesting.


Happy rebirth of the solar year, if you celebrate!  Happy SUNday!!!

Little Tiny

So, this is how it happened.

Dave saw that the City of Oklahoma City animal shelter was doing free cat and kitten adoptions during December.

He started pestering me to go get a free kitten last week.

I held out that we don't need to bring another cat into the house right now, with new vet bills, and with Annabel and Pete fighting like they do.

I said Annabel will pack her kit cat bag and move out!

But then, yesterday, we went to get haircuts, and to grab some lunch, but instead of taking us home, Dave drove us to the shelter.

We roamed around, and there were heartbreaking scenes left and right.

I was actually weeping as we walked through the cattery. So much abuse and neglect.

Dave went one direction, and I went another, and I followed the sound of plaintive cries.

There, along the wall, were traps and carriers with new arrivals.

One of them was a tiny black kitten, who was reaching his paws out through the wires, and meowing piteously.

I went and found Dave and brought him to the carrier.

He grabbed the intake form that was on top, and went to find someone.

Little Tiny had been caught and brought in just hours before our arrival. 

He had not yet been cleared by the vet, so we waited for them to examine him, and give him de-wormer, flea meds, and his baby shots.

We filled out forms, and thus came Little Tiny to be in our second bedroom!

We will foster him, and feed him up, and socialize him (although he's pretty well bonded to us already) until January 8.

On that day, we take him back to the shelter to be neutered (provided he has gained enough weight), and, at that point, if all has gone well with introducing him to the household, and he has stayed well, we can adopt him and register his microchip.

We will have saved another "free" black kitten from potential abuse and death.
He won't be dog bait, he won't be "sacrificed," he won't be tortured.
He will be loved.

The cool part is that the city pays for his shots, his neutering, and any veterinary care he may require between now and adoption day.
So, I didn't want to be doing this right now, but here we are, and I am in love.

He will eventually let us know what his name is, and this morning, he is much perkier and playful, after being pretty subdued yesterday and overnight. 

He's eating like CRAZY, and has used his litter box!  AND WHAT A PURR, for one so very tiny!

In other news, I am still doing mostly pretty well.  I have a lot of trouble sleeping, and a little bit of nausea here and there, but not too bad.

There were a few nights when I didn't have any cramps, but they came back Thursday, and I got almost no sleep that night, so I had to miss the dance studio party on Friday night.

I was just exhausted, and didn't need to be around a whole bunch of people in an enclosed space.  My immunity is low.

Then, Friday night, some IDIOT in an SUV playing extremely loud Mexican ooom-pah music pulled into the driveway next door at 1 in the morning, and I didn't get back to sleep until almost 4.

That's why Dave went out to get the groceries.  No way I was going out running errands, especially with a tiny kitten to take a nap with!

We got started on decorating for Yuletide yesterday.  I LOVE THE NEW SILVER TREE!  I will try to post a picture of it next week.

Happy holidays, as the days shorten, and we await the return of the Light!

So far, so good

Cycle one, round one has been okay.

I had some intestinal issues for a couple of days, but I knew what to do, and that has resolved itself.
I had a little nausea when the 72-hour anti nausea medication wore off Friday afternoon,  but only needed one of my tablets to waylay it.  The nausea never came back.
My mouth has felt a little funny, and is extra dry, but no sores yet.

The day after treatment, I had the expected reaction to the steroids, where my face and neck turn bright red, and puff up.  I discovered, much to my delight, that taking a benadryl helps!  I had never tried that before, and it really did give me some relief.

All in all, my energy level has been mostly normal.  (We went out and did all of our errands yesterday, then I came home and did all of my chores, a cooking project, got my holiday cards ready, and wrote my annual letter.)

The only thing I can't figure out is why I am having leg cramps EVERY NIGHT.  This is interrupting my sleep on the regular, and that's seriously not good.

I do EVERYTHING I know of to stop them from coming....friends make suggestions, and I seriously do ALL OF IT already.  I don't even LIKE bananas, but I force myself to eat them!!

I was up at 2:00 this morning doing yoga, and drinking magnesium water, after the third cramp.
Ugh.

The good part, if there is one, is that these cramps do not leave any residual pain, so I am not hobbled up from sore legs.

In other news, I had an encounter at work on Friday.

I have a co worker in my area who has intestinal gas issues, talks about it openly, and farts openly (I now, isn't that charming??).

THEN, she sprays air freshener. 

This has gone on for years.

Also, for years, I have asked her politely to NOT USE LYSOL.   Lysol spray causes me to have an allergic reaction. 

If it is sprayed near me, my eyes tear, my head pounds, my throat hurts and swells, and I sometimes even get hives. 

It's the same with certain perfumes, men's colognes, ALL products from Bed, Bath and Beyond, and Scentsy wax-melt fragrance machines.

She and I even talked about it as recently as the week before Thanksgiving, and I suggested she grab a can of the Febreeze from the ladies' room.

She did.  I SAW her bring the can to her desk!

BUT...she continued to use the Lysol.   She even hides it at her desk so that I can't go take it away (I have removed all of the other cans from the office, and put them elsewhere.  We have sanitizing wipes, we don't need to spray desks and keyboards with Lysol if someone has been ill).

So, this is how it goes.....I can hear her spray it, and there is a big fan in our room that I set behind me, pointing the spray away from me, and I have a little fan on my desk, which I aim up and away from me... but it's not enough.  It eventually drifts over to my area, and I start to have issues.

On Friday, after the SIXTH time she sprayed it, I went off.

At that point, it was feeling like her actions were intentional.  Like she was a 2 year old trying to see what she could get away with.

I SLAMMED the fan down behind me, and stalked out of the room while she was actually looking at me (because her back was turned to her work station as she chatted with her friends who were also turned away from their work stations).

I came back with a can of Febreeze from the ladies' room, interrupted her and her friends, and said
"I BEG YOU, STOP with the Lysol.  You KNOW I react to it! My eyes are tearing so I can't see my work, my head is pounding, my throat is closing, and right now I am on the verge of tears! PLEASE use this instead."

I wanted to say "HOW DARE YOU continue to do this when you KNOW I am back in chemo, and it's only going to get worse?  Spray it ONCE MORE, and you will be calling 9-1-1 for me, because I will be in full anaphylaxis."
But I didn't want to play the cancer card.

She sat there, dumbfounded, with a blank look on her face.  I THINK she said, meekly, "Okay," but I was so fired that up I don't remember.

Yes, I embarrassed her in front of her cronies.  Yes, I shocked her, because I am always the calm, quiet, smiling, friendly one.  I was so angry I was shaking. 

I did have flushing and hives on my neck and chest, too, but I didn't include that in my list when I was speaking.

The front desk lady saw me after, and asked why my neck was all red..... I told her Laura was at it with the freaking Lysol again.....

(she used to sit with us, but got the front desk job in October.)

Here's hoping that the only backlash is that she doesn't speak to me for a while.  That would be fine with  me.

If she ever sprays Lysol in our area again, I am in the director's office, with my supervisor, and we are having a meeting about hostile work environments.

ANYWAY....

Yesterday, Dave and Eric went out for a few beers, and Dave FINALLY broached the subject of Christmas Eve 2017.

Dave said Eric thought he had apologized, and Dave insisted that a text message does not an apology make, when you KNOW that the event you ruined is the most important night of the year to your step-mom.

Nothing has been said yet, and Eric did NOT come inside when he dropped Dave off, but I am to expect direct contact from Eric some time between now and Christmas Eve 2019!
We'll see what happens.

The ham arrived this week, and I have started to gather my thoughts regarding side dishes, and what I want to make for Solstice.

I'm so glad I have 5 days off for Yule and Christmas!

Today, we are going to Costco, and to visit Pop, then I have two cooking projects lined up.

It's supposed to be a beautiful "spring" day, with light breezes, and a high in the mid 60s.  I doubt we are going to have much winter time around the holidays this year.

Enjoy your Sunday Funday!

Mid week update

I see from my blogger statistics that I have readers now!  WELCOME, and feel free to peruse posts going back several years!

I typically post updates on SUNDAYS.  I started this during the beginning of my dance with cancer.  It was a way to keep everyone back home informed.

But, most everyone back home stopped reading it, HAHA....I think it fell off their radars.

Be that as it may, I have kept it up.  It's like a journal for me, and I can go back and recall things by reading my own words.

ANYWAY..... my treatment schedule is Tuesday afternoons, starting yesterday, going for thee weeks, with one week off.  My first week off will be Christmas, thank goodness!

This will go on for at least 3 months, possibly 4.  Not sure what the determining factor will be, though.

Cycle 1, round 1 is done, and I got through it just fine.  Slept a little last night, despite the steroids, and have my anti nausea medicine in my purse.

Off to work!

December is in like a lion

The raging wind is making the windows rattle this morning, but it's sunny and bright.  It will get up to 50 today.

Our unintended staycation has been okay. 

We've eaten well!  I've gained three pounds!

We've also done some reading, played lots of back gammon and dominoes, and watched Chicago themed movies for my sake.

It was gray and dreary every day except yesterday.   We really wanted the thunderstorms that they kept forecasting, but they never came.  It just drizzled.

Yesterday, Eric and Linda invited us out for lunch, and Dave accepted.  We met them at a favorite little restaurant, and then they came back here for a while.

Eric asked about Christmas Eve.

Dave had already promised me that he will have a chat with Eric about never apologizing for the Christmas from Hell, so now, he really has to follow through on that!

I was basically forced into a corner, and had to invite them while they were sitting there looking at me!  Eric knows my plans are the same every year, and basically invited himself and Linda.

So, some time in the next few weeks, I expect an awkward conversation with my step son. Yay.

We like Linda.  She's been very good for Eric.

She's a bank branch manager, and has grown sons (15 and 18, I think) who live with their dad.  We don't know the story on that.... but will eventually.

She's a few years older than Eric, and has a good head on her shoulders.

This morning, I am up and showered so we can get out and go grocery shopping while most OKC residents are at church.

Dave is probably going to go see Pop, and see if he has taken apart his new radio yet.

I haven't decided if I am going along this time.

I had planned to have some spiritual reflection time yesterday, but that didn't happen, so maybe today while Dave is out.

I hate that our five days off is almost over, but we get another five days at Christmas.  I was finally approved to take the Monday off that week.  (I requested it in January, but didn't find out if I could have it until a couple of weeks ago, due to the ABSURD policies at my office.)

Christmas week is my "off" week from the first round of chemo, so that will be nice.

I have been assured that I should not experience the same "roller coaster dip" that I did previously when in chemotherapy.

This is due to the fact that we are doing this "low and slow" method of several hours of treatment once a week for three weeks, instead of one big treatment every three weeks.

I should actually feel pretty good during the off weeks between rounds.

I sure hope my team is right, and that I will tolerate this as well as they have said.

I am off to make breakfast.  We actually bought a loaf of rustic bread to enjoy during these feast days, and I am going to slice some off, toast it, and fry up some eggs.

(we don't keep bread in the house because eating breads and pasta makes us fat, and increases our aches and pains, etc)

Have a good December Sunday!