Holding pattern

 No further news came on the condo this past week, so I emailed my attorney on Friday to ask for an update.

The only thing that came back was that there are some "minor documents" that the buyer needs to provide, and then we will be good to close 24 hours after she provides them.

Uh...could someone PLEASE light a fire under her ass to get this done?  I don't want to have to pay another mortgage payment!

I already paid the association again, out of our meager savings, because May's close of business was Friday at 5 (Monday is a holiday, and Tuesday, the dues are due).

Fuckity.

My attorney said that if we manage to close next week, the buyer will reimburse me for that round of dues.

She damned well better. 

It's not like I am made out of money. 

I still have to pay my bills, and Dave and I have a mortgage on the house we live in.  

I HAD A TENANT FOR A REASON!  I couldn't afford to own the condo, and live with my husband (who was unable to relocate to join me in Chicagoland), without one, and I haven't HAD a tenant since April!

Grumble.  I am SO SICK OF THIS.

Be that as it may, I got a settlement check from the October car accident this past week.  I have stashed it away in the condo account.  If I have to pay another month, the money is now available without having to borrow from a friend again. 

Good gawd.

Not much else to report.  I'm just trying to enjoy my last two weeks of working from home full time.  

When I made my weekly visit to the office on Friday, I found that someone has cleaned my desk, and had put an ergonomic keyboard back on it.  

Earlier this year, when there was a temp using my desk, she had them change the keyboard out to a regular one.  I can't use a regular one 8 hours a day without excruciating pain.

When the temp was let go, I asked to have my keyboard back, in case I needed to use my desk during my weekly visits, and my boss said no.

She. Said. No.  

Her reasoning was as ridiculous, and completely dismissive, as it usually is.  "Other people will be using that desk from time to time, and they might not like that kind of keyboard."

But... it's MY DESK.  It has my name plate on it.  It has my employee of the month certificate displayed.  My "kudos" notes from co workers....It's MY DESK.  

I'm one of the few people who has a work station at home AND at the office.... like all of the managers (cynical laughter).

So, I was prepared to purchase an ergo keyboard myself, and take it with me when we go back to the office to work,  and bring it home every night.

Needless to say, I was pleased when I found a brand new ergo keyboard sitting on my desk on Friday.

We had a virtual team meeting on Thursday, and were shown some blueprint drawings of the new building.  It looks pretty nice.  

I THOUGHT I spied that my desk will be off in a corner with an open space next to it.... it is NOT in the call center.  

I asked if we could get copies of the drawings emailed to us, and was told no, not until they take the names off of the spaces, to avoid un-wanted drama.

Really?  Then why did you put the blueprints with the names up on the screen for all to see just now?

Huh?

Whatever.

Anyway, we are off to Target this morning to do an errand, and then having a friend over for lunch.  It's supposed to rain on Memorial day, so we are having our very simple cook out today.

Still enjoying the unseasonably mild weather, and hoping to possibly go for a walk in a park this afternoon.

FINALLY, some good news about the condo

 On Thursday night, they asked for another extension... this time, until JUNE 2nd:  past the time that I would have to pay another month of association dues, and headed toward the next mortgage payment.

My attorney suggested we say no.... ONE MORE WEEK is all we are willing to go.  He suggested the pressure might do some good.

I heartily agreed, but was still a bit freaked out.

The next day, by day's end, we got the good news that the buyer's mortgage was in underwriting, at last.  

They FINALLY got the employment verification put through. 

Now, if we can just close before I have to pay again. 

I can finally relax a little.  Not fully, but a little.  I am still having to accept that I am basically being screwed on the pay out.

It's been a cool, damp week here.  Not much sunshine.  We've been able to get out and walk, though, since it hasn't really RAINED much.

My visit to the clinic was better than the last time I had to get my port flushed, but did not go 100% smoothly.  

I hate when they have issues with the port, and this time, even the nurse who has never had a problem with it had to try twice.  GAH!

SO very sick of it...but doc says better to have it and not need it.... ugh.  A constant reminder that I am always going to be stage 4.

When I go next month, it will be a week after my scans, and I will have labs, and see the doctor.  Let's hope all is well.  

Nothing much to report, other than that. Have a good week! 

It's confirmed...

 ... my co workers and I are being forced to go back to work in our office in September, in the new building (that is almost an hour from home, taking heavy traffic into consideration).

We were originally assured that we would be able to maintain the option of working from home, at least part of the time, since we are already set up to do so.

Now, however, they're saying it's not cost effective to set the office up with computers on every desk, while we keep the computers we already have at home.  

They are basically saying you will work at the office, or you will be unemployed.

I already have two computers (one at home, and one on my desk at the current office), but they can't make exceptions for anyone due to special circumstances, like ongoing cancer treatment in an as yet not fully mitigated pandemic.

SO, I am trying to focus on the positives.

My level of gratitude for this past year of working at home knows no bounds.  

Being able to throw laundry into the washer, start dinner, or do little chores -WHILE WORKING- frees up time after work, and on the weekends....The daily walks around the neighborhood on break, working with one of our three cats purring in my lap (or lying near by, on the futon), being able to swear (at volume) when work frustrates me, being able to sit out in my yard at lunch time, and even just go out the back door to pick my lunch out of my little garden, being able to physically eat my lunch whenever I want, instead of waiting to clock out,  being able to flop onto my yoga mat, and roll around on the floor when sitting gets to be too much, being able to sleep later than when I have to get up and go, having a WINDOW to look out of, being able to hear the rain, the birds, and my wind chimes.....  

The main thing that has come out of this is the greater availability of time to relax, and to go be in nature.  We've explored state parks, and gone to local parks, that we simply did not have time for while working outside of the home full time...... it's been wonderful....

But, here we are, with a few months to prepare for the shift back to working outside of the home. 

Dave's office is also saying they will go back in September.   

If he is not allowed to continue to work from home (there is even less reason for him to go back to his office than there is for me), we will be forced to purchase a second car.  

Between my new hour commute one way, and having to buy a car, going back to the offices will put a new financial burden on us

I am pretty sure neither of our employers will give us a raise to make up for this. ESPECIALLY mine.

But....back to the positives.  

The new building won't be flood-prone, and full of black mold.  Interacting with people other than Dave will be good for my mental health.  Having less time at home will be good for my mental health.  I have learned that my desk will NOT be in the new call center, and this is HUGE.  Being forced to drive will help me heal the PTSD I have from being hit so many times since moving to OKC. I hope... and I hope more driving won't attract more distracted drivers to hit me even more frequently. 

I'm working on it. 

In other news, another delay on the closing for the condo came through.  

We did not close, again, this past Thursday (third week in a row it's been delayed).  The issue remains that the buyer's employer keeps filling out the employment verification forms incorrectly.  For some reason, it took three weeks for her attorney to step up and say that he will walk the employer through the process so that we can end this ordeal once and for all.

I also got closing paperwork that shows that selling this property is costing me $13,000.00  I will get MUCH less pay-out at the end than I had anticipated.

I blame myself for this, because I let my anxiety rule me, and, instead of seeing to my own best interests at the beginning, I let Dave and my friend initiate the process. 

There should have been an argument about the selling price, and there should have been some shopping around for a more AFFORDABLE realtor.

But, done is done, and I just want it over with at this point.

SO this past week was not great. 

Looking forward to better news next week.  At least the positive test rate for covid 19 is below 4% in Oklahoma right now.  

We will continue to wear our masks when going indoors anywhere, whether they're required or not.  Our status as high risk hasn't changed, and we KNOW that people who are anti maskers to begin with are going to lie about their vaccinated status.  ESPECIALLY in Oklahoma.

I am off to get some breakfast on this cloudy, lazy Sunday.  I get my injection and my port flush on Wednesday, but nothing else is on the agenda for the coming week.

It just keeps going, and going, and going

 Another extension was granted to the buyer of the condo.  This is the third one.

This time, because they're asking because her mortgage lender is having trouble getting verification of her employment.  

This had to have already been verified for her to be pre-qualified, but I guess they have to verify it again before closing.

SO...here we are, a few days away from me being in default, and my mortgage company will not grant me a one month grace period.  I've called them twice.

Fortunately, a friend loaned me the money to pay the mortgage, and I did that on line this morning, so that it will be drafted tomorrow, before I go into default.

No late fee, and no more worrying about what will happen to my credit.

This is ridiculous.  

I know of at least two other people who have sold property that was bid upon, accepted, contracted, and closed AFTER I accepted this bid in March.

Anyway, the good news is that she has filled out the association's paperwork, and paid their move in fees...so she is still wanting the property, but her lender keeps messing things up.

Who did she use?  Joe Schmoe's Mortgage Company, "we specialize in foot dragging??"

I had a conference call with my attorney and realtor on Thursday, and they were ready to pull the plug on this deal, but I said no, because the buyer has taken that step of the association paperwork and fees. 

 Apparently, my attorney did not know this, even though it was his legal assistant who told me..... and I THOUGHT that everyone was included in that email conversation, but I guess they weren't.

Oops.

SO, we are all on the same page now, and I didn't hear anything different on Friday, so I am thinking no news was good news.  I have to at this point, because the stress is amping up again.

In other news, my FMLA status expired at work.  I requested the forms from H/R in March, but never got a response, and managed to forget about it myself after sending that email (our H/R person is almost completely useless).

The other day, my boss called me and said that the time I need to take off for my next treatment and for my scans, will not be under FMLA because it's expired!

I told her I requested the paperwork in March, because I get a reminder in my calendar every year. She stepped up and said that she wanted to know about every step of the process, so that the process will be expedited.

I added her to the email conversation, and someone in H/R added the Director, too, so everyone knows what happened.  This is a good thing.

The form was attached to the email, so I forwarded it to my nurse, and had it back by mid afternoon on Friday, and it is now in my boss's hands, as well as H/R.

Hopefully, it won't take forever now to be accepted, and for me to be certified FMLA-qualified.

Not much else to report.  The weather this past week has been glorious, but today is cool and extremely windy.  

We should have done yard work yesterday, but it was near 90 degrees, extremely windy, and sunny....it was actually too hot, and that wind is completely exhausting.  Today, it's still going to be a challenge, but we have GOT to get some of it done.

Off to Costco this morning, hoping that mothers' day will ensure that fewer people will be there.

I personally don't really relate to mother's day anymore.  My step son, who used to say that I was the coolest step mom ever, has now cut both his dad and myself completely out of his life.

So...whatever.  But...Happy mother's day if you celebrate it...

What day is it?

This staycation has been particularly relaxing.  I feel calm, and centered, and a little bit happy.  I've noticed that my laugh is different... more ... real (like it used to be), and I've been joking and feeling more like myself.

I've even had to ask myself, several times, 'what day is this?'  That is a good indication that I was able to TOTALLY let go of most of my worries, and I didn't even think about work until Dave asked me something on Friday, when we were near the office for lunch on a patio.

I got my container garden planting completed, and Dave got a start on the yard work he has been putting off for months.

While I was putting the garden together, a really interesting feeling came over me, and I started to just hum a little tune.

I think maybe it was "peace."  

I'd forgotten what it was like to feel peaceful.  I hope that having a garden again, after literally decades, will help me to get that back on a more regular basis.  

I even felt peaceful yesterday as I sat over my lettuce garden pulling caterpillars off of the leaves.  Yes, something was eating my salads already, HAHA!  

We had a nice little escape to a state park on my birthday.  

It was a gloomy day, with patches of sunshine, and there was NO ONE in the part of the woods where we went hiking.  Not one other human.  

Dave dipped our canteen into the spring, right by the outlet, and we tasted pure, earth-given water.  

We heard something on the other side of the creek that might have been a wild bore.  There was snuffling and grunting.  Not something a deer would be doing.  Never did see what it was, though.

Dave wasn't feeling too well, so we had to go back to the room, and I didn't get to do nearly as much hiking and exploring as I had wanted to.  

Being there in the middle of the week, in April, really did guarantee that we'd be the only ones, or almost the only ones, there.

The room at the lodge was a bit disappointing.  The "park view" of the room they put is in was a cinder block wall, that formed a little man made ravine. A young, but dead tree had been thrown down there, into the trash filled space between our room and the wall we were looking at. 

The towels were stained, the phone didn't work to call for our meals ("pick up available, just call your order in from your room!"), so we had to go sit at the restaurant. 

Fortunately, we were able to sit outside for dinner, and there was no one else in the restaurant for breakfast.

Dave arranged for the electrical upgrade to be done on the house on Thursday, so we were hiking in the woods Thursday morning (which was GORGEOUS, bright, and cool) when the electrician texted and said he needed to get into the house. 

He had previously said that all of the work would be outside, so we left the gate open, and didn't need to worry about rushing back from our park get away.  Our house sitter was here when they arrived, and all was well, so she left. 

Surprise!  We had to cut the morning hike short, and head home.

They didn't even ask to be let into the house for like 4 hours after we arrived.  Dammit.  

SO my birthday getaway was not what I had hoped for, but it did have highlights. 

Also on Wednesday, before we left for the park, I got a series of emails that indicated that the condo buyer FINALLY paid her fees, and filled out her paperwork for the condo association.  

They also refused to let me skip the May dues assessment, and demanded that I mail it immediately.... even though when I was in the auto withdrawal program, they never withdrew the money from my account until the 11th, and the closing is now scheduled for the 13th.

What the hell ever.

I am happy to be done with them forever after this is finalized.

The legal assistant who is handling the condo association part is going to see if I can get that money back from the buyer, since the TWO delays/contingency extensions have been caused by their side not being prepared or organized enough to smoothly transition to closing on the original date of 4/29/21, or even to 5/3/21.

Anyway, I got my first farm to home delivery bag on Friday.  

I signed up for this program that provides a weekly bag of locally produced vegetables and fruits, and you can order additional local products (at additional cost, obviously) to be added to your bag if you so desire.  

The bag I signed up for only costs about $20 a week...and you get SO MUCH.  It's actually cheaper than the grocery store. 

I looked at the meats on the website, though, and they are super expensive.

There was a LOT of greens/lettuces in this bag...so much that we won't likely be able to finish it all before it starts to go bad, but everything else was in reasonable quantities.  

I find this exciting, because I will be FORCED to expand my horizons, and branch out in my meal planning!  I am going to have so much fun!

For example, there was a bunch of baby turnips in this bag, and a shallot.  I sliced the turnips up, and dressed them with oil and balsamic vinegar, garlic, and parsley, diced half the shallot, and wrapped that up in a foil packet.

While my turkey breast tenderloin (which I had brined all afternoon) was in the grill, using the smoker technique, I threw that packet on about half way through cooking.

The turnips were extremely flavorful, and just barely tender, with a nice little bit of crunch left.  It was so good, I can't even describe it.  Dave raved about how good it was.... 

Unfortunately, the  turnip greens didn't look good, so I had to toss them.  The rainbow carrots also had a lot of greens, which I also had to chop off.

Wish we had a compost bin!  

Maybe that will be my next step!

Today, the rest of the shallot is going into a salad.  There were also cucumbers, pink lemons, and those rainbow carrots.... Yay!   I am thinking of roasting the carrots in brown butter.... hmmm.....

Anyway, once my little garden starts to produce, I will step back on the deliveries to every other week, most likely. We will for sure be getting our 4 to 5 servings a day of fruits and vegetables!!

Today is mostly going to be an easy day.  Dave is going to get a hair cut, and I have to set my office back up, and do a little work on my course.

I had a fire in the chiminea last evening, and did some of my course work around that.  It was such a nice evening!  Cool, and a little breezy....ahhhh.....

While we were in the hot tub last night, a cooling drizzle fell on our faces for a few minutes.  It was magical!

I am going to try to reframe my thinking about Sunday nights.... focusing on the potential of the new week, instead of dreading having to clock back in on Monday morning.  

I really don't like my job, but I am extremely grateful for it!  

So---Happy New Week, everyone!