Heart break and hope

 We lost our Scamper overnight, this past Tuesday.

It was ironic, because Dave and I were JUST talking about how we never saw her or Sammie cross the street.  They always stayed in our yard, or went into the other back yards that connect with ours.

But then, on Tuesday evening, which was full moon,  I kept going outside to see if I could get some pictures of the moon rise.

I saw them in the yard just across from us, chasing bugs.  I chided them to "get back home!!"  

I took a picture of them over there to show to Dave.... since we had JUST been talking about that very subject.

Scamper never made it back home.  

Dave saw her lying in the street early Wednesday morning, killed by a car.

We buried her next to the two of her siblings that died here, after Sammie brought everyone to us last August.  I put her toys into the grave with her.

The ones she brought to us, having stolen them from neighboring yards.

It was absolutely devastating.  We both cried all day. 

We loved her so much, and she adored us.

Tuesday afternoon, I had been out on the back porch, and she was literally all over me, with purrs and meeps. 

She was the sweetest, most loving little spirit.

I forgot about the picture that I had taken until a couple of days ago, when I was going through the pictures in my phone.

In it, Scamper is jumping, so she looks like an actual spirit.  

We both wept again when we looked at it.  I can't delete it.  That one is a keeper.

Sammie has been staying very close ever since.  She follows us around meowing, and sometimes just sits on the front porch, looking across the street.  It's heart wrenching.

For the first day, she was going from the front to the back of the house, over and over, yowling.  Calling for her last baby.

We are so grateful that we were able to save two of them.  We did literally everything we could for those Kittenea kittens... even more that we could, since people donated food and money to help us.

We also know that this is often the fate of feral cats, or just cats whose humans stupidly let them go outside in a city.  

We never expected it, though, and it was horrible in every way.

This past Thursday was scan day, and all went smoothly.  I can look up the results, but I will wait until I see my doctor next week, also on Thursday, to get any news.

Hopefully, it will all be good!  

I also have my heart ultrasound this coming Tuesday, and noticed that they have now scheduled me for chemo after my doctor visit, so that's no longer a mystery.  

It would have been nice of someone to CALL me, but they never do.  Thankfully, I check the "My Chart" app regularly.

There were violent storms in Oklahoma last night.  No damage here, but there were serious situations in a couple of smaller towns.

Two dead, so far, that I have heard, and one downtown area was completely wiped off of the map.  So sad. 

Today is my 62nd birthday.  It is not lost on me that I was 52 when I was diagnosed with stage 4 breast cancer.

To begin my celebration, we went to the woods this morning.  On the way, we saw a kettle of Mississippi Kites returning to their home for the summer!  

I LOVE that they came back ON my birthday this year!

Anyway, we got to the woods 2 hours later than planned, because we spent an hour in heavy traffic (we forgot about the OKC Marathon, and that it crosses May Avenue TWICE), and then went to breakfast first, rather than after.

When we got to the woods, though, there weren't very many cars, so it was still nice and quiet.  There was a gentle mist, and it was cool and cloudy, so it wasn't as crowded as it would have been in better weather.

As we walk along, I always look for deer, and I was not disappointed this morning.  

Off to our left, I saw a doe, lying in the grass.  She was relatively far from the path, and alone, which was unusual.  

We walked a few more feet, and had a different angle to look at her, and that was when we spotted her new born fawn.

I gasped, my heart leapt, and tears filled my eyes.

Happy Birth - Day, Little One!!  

That explained why she was not surrounded by other deer. 

It was the most beautiful thing I could have seen, on this particular day.  I tried to get pictures, but they were too far away for just having a phone camera.

So, our week went from utter heart break, to a symbol of absolute hope.  

Between seeing the kites, and the newborn, our healing has begun.

The weather is supposed to clear later today, and we will place a flagstone on the fresh grave.  Dave also picked one up for the siblings' grave, which just has a 12 x 12 concrete paving tile on it.  The flagstones look nicer. 

I did the mowing yesterday, and hopefully, Dave will do his chores this afternoon.

My birthday wish is to go out for sushi for dinner!

Have a great week.

New doctor

 I saw my new "doctor" this past week.  She isn't actually a doctor, but a Physician's Assistant, and I really liked her.

She spent a lot of time with me, and did a thorough exam of my potential injuries.  Then, I went down the hall and got a full series of xrays, right then and there.

Some of the xrays have been read, and it LOOKS LIKE the reports are showing up in "My Chart,"  but, at the moment, they ALL have the same report, which is the results of just one view, so I will wait, and take another look in a few days.

The one report that IS there is for the neck view, and it shows NO fractures.  

It's odd that they same verbiage is on all of the reports. Some kind of glitch, maybe.

Anyway, it's not my neck that hurts, really.  It's between my shoulder blades, so we shall see. 

I still think it's just muscle/soft tissue, but we need to make sure.

My PA said that she would be happy to order some physical therapy for me if the pain continues. 

This coming week, I have my CT scans, and bone scan, on Thursday, and then, next Tuesday, the heart ultrasound that I get every 2 months.

THEN, I see the oncologist on Thursday of that week, and we shall see if she orders my treatment for that afternoon as well.

I hate having all of these appointments.  Ugh.

At least it's only every 6 months when they pile up like this, HAHA!

We had a weather change that was supposed to bring us much needed rain, but all we got was colder weather and that annoying, irritating wind.

It should be getting back up to relatively normal temperatures next week, though, with more possibility of rain.

We are off to Costco this morning, and Dave wants to go to Fuzzy's Tacos for brunch, so we are off to do that, after the Kroger Grocery delivery gets here around 9 am.

Have a great week!

THAT didn't go as planned....

 Our trip to Arkansas was an adventure!

Travel on Sunday was lovely.... low traffic all the way, and no life-threatening situations on the highway.

However, when we arrived at our motel, it turned out to be an absolute DUMP.  It was truly awful.  Probably the worst place either of us has ever paid to stay in.

There was no toilet paper, no soap, only one towel, no cups, and everything was plugged into a power strip behind the tv, which didn't work.

The paint was peeling in the bathroom, and there was some mysterious liquid in the trash can.  The fridge was also full of water.

Dave went down to the office to ask for the missing items, and no one ever brought them, so he had to go back and collect them himself.

AND the ice machine didn't work.

When my sister and brother in law arrived, almost 2 hours after we did, they put them into a smoking room, which STUNK, did not have a fridge or microwave, and had burn holes in the bed spread.

They went to complain, and were MOVED TO A DIFFERENT PLACE that the same owners ran.  Their alternate place was MUCH nicer.

I suppose we could have gone down and said we booked to stay in the same place FOR A REASON, and could they please move us too, but we had already settled into the room, and I didn't have the energy or will power to pack everything up again.

Their place was only a block away, so it was okay.

We ate at a Tex-Mex place that was right across the street from our dump, and went back to our rooms to crash.  

The a/c unit in our room was nice and quiet, and provided enough white noise to block some of the racket from the noisy motel.  I actually did sleep for a few hours!

Our beds were amazingly clean and relatively comfortable!

The eclipse day was spectacular.  We met up for breakfast, went exploring the town, and then arrived at our main destination (one of the only places in town that served beer, and had a patio for sitting outside to watch the eclipse), without any issues.

We had beautiful weather, clear skies, and a fun place to hang out to watch the eclipse, with 150 of our "closest friends."

The really BIG crowds were elsewhere, so we had a great spot.  

The eclipse itself was very moving, as I could not remember ever witnessing totality before.

When we went to Missouri in 2017, we had cloud cover, and couldn't see the actual total eclipse.

This was wonderful, and we had a really great time!

Unfortunately, we had to get up and leave early in the morning, so we could get back home, and be rested for work on Wednesday.

We went to Cracker Barrel for breakfast as soon as it opened.

It was raining when we left, but we eventually drove out from under the rain.

Traffic was a lot heavier on Tuesday, as we expected it to be, but it was going along okay until we got close to Clarksville, AR. 

We were in the left lane, in a line of traffic, and were being tail-gaited by a woman in a white SUV.

That was when the semi in the right lane, which we were passing, cut us off, and Dave had to hit the brakes.

If he had not, the back end of the truck would have wiped us off of the planet.

Of course, there was no time for the SUV to stop, so she rammed into the rear end of our car, and the semi just kept going.

This is the EIGHTH time we have been hit, while driving, since I moved to the south.  This was the second time at high speed, on the highway.

We are acutely aware of how lucky we are to be alive!

Anyway, we both pulled off to the left, and Dave called 9-1-1.  

The lady ran out of her car and came to ask if we were okay.  She was genuinely concerned, which was nice, and it turned out, she was from Oklahoma as well.

We didn't have to wait long for the police to show up.  They said this was a common spot for wrecks, due to the on ramp that apparently doesn't have a long enough merging lane.

We sat on the left shoulder, as 75 mph traffic blew past us....it was terrifying.

Eventually, though there was a clear spot, and we were able to get back on the road.  

The lady who hit us stayed a bit longer with the police, and we are assuming it was to collect her ticket for following too closely.

The body shop will be looking at my car next week, and will determine if it's just the bumper, or if the frame is damaged, too.

The damage appears to be relatively minor, which, in itself, is a miracle, since we were going so fast. 

 The speed differential between our car and hers had to have been small, so she must also have slammed on her brakes, as well.   It's an additional miracle that we didn't end up in a multi car pile up, given the traffic.

Also, the lady who hit us HAS INSURANCE, which is a FURTHER miracle unto itself!  All of the times we have been hit, she is only the 3rd (or maybe 4th) at-fault driver to be insured.

We are both achy in new places, my neck is making noise, and we are waiting for the attorney we contacted to get us set up for an appointment.  

They will, we assume, send us to the doctor they work with.  That's what happened the last time, anyway.

Dave has pulled the dash cam out of the car to see if we can get any information about the truck.

Anyway, that really rattled us, as you can well imagine, so we pulled off and went to a diner, where we stayed for a good long time.

Arrived home safely, but exhausted, a few hours later than planned.

I was just starting to get over my PTSD related to highway travel, too, and now it's FULL BLOWN again.

When I have to get behind the wheel tomorrow to go to work, I hope I don't end up having an anxiety attack.  My commute is all surface streets, though, so I am thinking that I will be able to handle it.

Had my treatment this past Thursday, and all went fine.

Next up, scans of every kind a few days before my birthday, in ten days or so. 

Then, I will see the doctor on May 2nd, and get results, and she will determine if we continue this same protocol, or change it.

No further chemo appointments are scheduled, though, so I am not sure how that will work, since my appointment with her is on the same day that my next treatment would normally be.  I wonder if she will have me stay, after she sees me, and get my treatment.

Whatever.... it will be what it is.

I got a lot of work done around the house yesterday, inside and out, taking advantage of the pain relief from my treatment steroids.... but today, I am hurting again. Ugh.

Dave put off all of his work until today, so he has a lot to do. 

We have friends traveling through Oklahoma, and will meet with them for dinner. That should be fun!

Have a great week!