Is March over yet?

This has not been the best of months, but it seems to be improving.

My tenant's rent check got here already, so I can deposit it before I have to pay the mortgage. That's always nice when that happens.

All I have left of the flu is a nagging, tickly cough that comes and goes. Unfortunately, one of the times it always seems to come is in the middle of the night.

One up shot of having been so sick is that I lost 3 pounds that I really wanted to lose and couldn't seem to get rid of.

One of my co workers in my cube is on maternity leave, but the other one has been sick too, and his cough has been constant, loud, and merciless.

The older lady in the cube next to mine has been coughing for 8 weeks. Friday, she didn't stop all afternoon.

Even though the guy I sit with was off Friday, thank GOD, her coughing more than took over for his.....so there was no break.

Every day this past week, I came home from work feeling battered by the loud noise.

I have always been sensitive to loud noise....but have no recollection of ever having to deal with it all day every day like this before.

I feel bad for these people, but at the same time, having to hear all of this loud coughing was making me nervous, uncomfortable, angry, and anxious. I'd have to lie down every day in the silence when I got home.

I slept 13 hours Friday night out of sheer exhaustion.

It was really having a bad effect on me. Like there should be something that corporate can do about such unacceptable working conditions!

My shoulder is almost completely pain free already, thanks to the chiropractor I've been seeing, and thanks to taking care of it myself as best I can as well.

The daffodils are blooming, and the tulips are budding, and I'm used to the time change now.

This past week I had a very rough time with one of the social media sites I've been hanging out at for 5 years.

I've been bullied there before, and had said if anyone else ever started to show signs of hating me for no reason again, I'd leave.

I go there to have fun. To experience community. Not to be told what a horrible person I am.

Well, it happened.

One of the most loved members of that community started e-bullying me several months ago, and he was a facebook friend too, where he started doing this weird, stalkerish crap (copying something I'd post, then waiting a while, and then putting my own words in a post in order to personally insult me in some way---VERY weird), so I blocked him there....but unfortunately, you can't block anyone at this other site, and you can't delete stuff they post to you like you can on facebook.

He left me alone for a little while, after I dumped him and blocked him on facebook.....and he made a scene about it, passive aggressively, at this other place.

For a couple of months, we just ignored one another quite effectively. I was prepared to continue to do that, but....

One day this past week, he started at me again....and he pushed my buttons one more time....so I baled.

( or is it bailed?)

This was the site I joined so that I could get to know Dave better....so, really, I don't need it anymore for that.

I've made some real life friends there, but it's not worth it to me to spend my time trying to chat with people there if someone is coming after me, and making it NOT FUN.

Unfortunately, this is a person who has nothing else to do but hang out on internet websites, and once he locks on to you, he will keep after you until you either learn to ignore him completely, or leave.

When he was doing that weird shit on facebook, I found out from others that he has done this sort of thing before. He has several people on his list, and now that I'm one of them, I'm gone. No more.

He's bored, he's in chronic pain, so constantly on heavy meds....and he gets his jollies from trying to stir people up.

I have trouble ignoring it when people come after me in anger or mean-ness for NO REASON, so I chose to leave.
I am NOT a horrible person, even though he thinks I am--and even though I spent an entire day soul searching, and trying to determine if he's right about me!!

I don't have room in my head for his bullshit.

I learned a lot about myself in the process of stepping away from the computer, though.

I learned how much time I spent sitting with my hands on a keyboard, "chatting" with people all around the world, and I learned how dependent I have become on this community as an outlet for social energy. I have come to rely on it too much, I think. In the absence of friends in daily life, I have come to count on it.

And now that it's gone, the separation has been very difficult. In a way, that's sort of weird, don't you think?

And I also learned that many people apparently perceive EVERYTHING I SAY as negative, selfish, and self righteous (thanks to a comment from my own husband. We later discussed how this was a mis communication on our part, and that he didn't mean to infer the superlative that EVERYTHING I SAY is negative, but while I was thinking that was what he meant, it really caused me to examine why I ever went to that website in the first place!)

I have no idea how they get that impression, because I am everything but those things.

Yes, I vent from time to time, because I have no real friends here to talk to, and I have a LOT of crap on my plate....but I also express compassion, advice, friendship, and humor at every possible opportunity.

Everyone in that community vents from time to time....it's social media. We're human beings with both stresses and pleasures in our lives. It's why we go there....it's why we chat, for fuck's sake.

If the only thing people can see is the venting, I guess I'll just stop. I firmly disagree with the perception that I am any of those things, but if that's what they see, I can't change it.

It's sad to lose an outlet for social energy, though. Sad indeed.

Dave says I should just consider it a break, and come back.....but I don't think so. Because as soon as I do, that ass hole will start pestering me again, and I'm just too sensitive. Even though I know he has a list of people he does this to, I will take it to heart again, and go through this "am I really that horrible" thing again....and, like I said, I don't have room in my head for that shit.

On a MUCH happier note, one week from today, I'll be waking up with one of my best friends under my roof! Jessie is due to arrive, along with her mom, next Saturday--the last day of March -- some time.

So today, we will be cleaning.