Dance show success

I borrowed skirts, and jewelry, and a veil.... I went to class for 6 months to learn and master a short choreography.... I practiced....

and last night....

I danced with my class on stage for about 4 minutes.

Lots of prep for a moment in the spot light!

But, it was fun, and we nailed it.  At least, I think we nailed it.  I know that my arms were in the wrong position on two momentary occasions.  Oh well.

It was fun. We were gorgeous.

Unfortunately, the skirts were white, and the foot lights were INTENSELY bright, so the cell phone pictures Dave took did not turn out well enough to share here.

Hopefully, someone else had a different angle.  Or the back-stage posed shots a couple of the girls have in their cell phones will be shared eventually on Facebook, and I can post them here.

Dave's trip to Houston was good for him.  He got to catch some fish this time, and he made it home safely on Tuesday evening.

Today, we have some sunshine, so will finish the yard work we didn't get done last weekend.

Have a good Sunday!

Bachelorette day

It's going to be 87 degrees today, and the wind is whipping.

Dave left at 0:dark:30 this morning to go visit one of his brothers, and I was out mowing the back yard by 9 am.

It had to get done, or it would be too tall to mow at all by next week, because we have an old- fashioned reel mower.

It was lovely out at that early hour, but now, it's hot.

I am supposed to do a little hand sewing today.  I have a button to tighten up on one of Dave's shirts, a little hole to sew up in one of my favorite tops, and then I have to sew eyes in to my new dance bra that line up with the hooks on my mesh body stocking.

I keep putting it off because I HATE TO SEW!

It's been over a week, now,  since I got the injections in my wrists, and everything is going well.  My thumb is still locking first thing in the morning, but it doesn't hurt, and eventually stops doing it.

I've changed up how I do the part of my job that is hardest on my hands/wrists, and I wear my braces every day, even if I am not in pain.

(that part of the job is folding and stuffing thousands of pages of paper documents every morning)

I've spent a lot of time today just sitting outside.  This morning, after I mowed, I was drenched in sweat, and sat out on the back step in the breeze for quite some time, letting my hair and clothes dry out a little.

Then, a little while ago, I went out and swept the front porch and steps, and sat there in the shade for a good long time.

I've been thinking today about all of the pets I have loved (and who have loved me), and about how I have not been able to make myself be with most of them when they've had to be put down.   

I spent a good long time saying "I'm so sorry" to each of their loving spirits this afternoon as I sat outside.

This was spurred by a blog post I read on Facebook this morning....written from the point of view of an old dog on his last day.

I wept, sobbed, and realized that by NOT being with them, I was being a complete coward.  

Dave and I held Jack when he died, and I will never do anything other than that in the future, no matter how much it tears me up.  

THAT is the moment when they need us the most.... and I will never cop out again.

Pete and Annabel are both sleeping at the moment.  I will have to give Annabel her prozac later by myself.  Dave and I have been tag teaming her, but I'm on my own today.

She is doing really well on it.  It seems to be helping.

Poor babies are so anxious.  I wish we knew why, and could fix it.

Hot shots

I got a call from the orthopedist office on Monday, and was able to schedule my cortisone shots for the same day as my oncologist appointment for my shot at THAT clinic.

I was able to add a little of time off from work to that time that was already scheduled without any problems (surprisingly--since taking time off is like pulling organs out of bodies without cutting the skin).

The shots hurt FAR worse than the first time, and I cried when we got back in the car.  It was INTENSE, and the pain from the injections lasted for hours.

The morning of my appointment, my thumb had started to lock up again, too, like it was doing before the injection in December.

The ortho elected not to inject the thumb again, and just did the wrists.

So far, the effects have been positive.

The doc says it takes 48 to 72 hours for the full effect to become evident, but I remember from last time, that it took more like a week to ten days for the cyst on the left wrist to go away.

I went grocery shopping Friday night, and did not have excruciating pain while handling my purse, and did not come close to dropping items because it hurt so much to lift them off of the shelves into the grocery cart.

Then, that evening, I reached around and scratched my own back!!

Yesterday, I did chores, and cooking, and laundry, and had FAR fewer incidents of popping and pain.  Even played my guitar last evening!!

We got into our hot tub last night, and I slept better last night than I have in probably 2 full months.

SO, please add your positive hopes to mine that this will eventually provide complete and permanent relief.

Thank you.

Dave will deliver the baked pasta I made for his dad, and go get the groceries for him, this afternoon. I will practice the dance routine for this semester's recital, which is coming up on the 25th.

My sweet friend, Rebecca, is custom making me a costume for someone without breasts.

Not much else is on the agenda for today.

We missed a local protest yesterday because the weather was cold and damp, and I don't need to get sick again (since my co workers were all sick again this past week, forced to come to work sick because they're not allowed to use their sick time to be sick).

We were supposed to get heavy rains yesterday, but they never came.  There's another chance tonight.  I hope it rains.  This state has been on fire again lately.

Windfall

Our tax refunds, and Dave's annual bonus, hit the bank this week, AND Dave gets an additional bonus this year for 35 years with the gas company.

He decided to use his extra bonus to buy a new, state of the art TV, blue ray player, antenna, and stand for it all to sit on.

The newest technology creates a pretty amazing picture, I have to say, and the new set up looks really nice.  I actually picked out the stand, and we are happy with it.

I didn't think we needed to do all of that, but it was his money, and his choice.

Some of the windfall money is going toward more home improvements.  The majority of the improvements this year will be internal instead of external. We aren't going to spend NEAR as much as we did last year.

That means that there might be some cash left over!

At the moment, the plans are for a new kitchen faucet, and the installation of a garbage disposal and water filtration system; replacement of the water hydrants under the house; and the installation of lights under the car port.

We are also planning a vacation to Chicago, and have purchased RIDICULOUSLY expensive tickets to  a Cubs game.

I also am replacing some of my shoes, and would like another swim suit for the hot tub.  These are things I have denied myself because of not wanting to spend the money.

I finally got fed up with the wrist pain that has returned on my left side, and started on my right side.  There are days, again, when I can't use my hands at all without pain.

The cortisone shots I got in December were partially successful, though.  My right thumb is cured, and the cyst on the left side is gone.

I put a call in to the nurse at the orthopedic doctor's office on Friday, and explained that the medication that caused this issue was withdrawn after my injections in December.

I am hoping that I can try another set of injections before we have to consider surgery, since the pain on the left came back, and the pain on the right started, before that medication was completely out of my system.

I should have an answer this week.

In the meantime, I have completely missed my opportunity to get licensed as a massage therapist in the state of Oklahoma, so I guess I am "officially" retired.

The National Certification program ended on the last day of December (with a grace period until the end of March).

That would have been my "grandfathering" credential to get licensed without having to undergo rigorous testing AND provide proof of graduation from a massage school.

I've been in practice for over 25 years, and do not have a diploma.

So. Oh well.

My thousands of hours of hands on experience are for naught if I don't have a credential to prove that I know my stuff, and my wrists have been so bad, that I did not pursue licensing.  What would be the point if I can't work anymore?

Besides, I have never been able to get a business going down here, and only see a few clients a year.  Again, what would be the point of getting a license?

In other news, Annabel is now on prozac, too.  Pete has been on it since I started chemo, to get him to leave me alone long enough to sleep at night.

Annabel is now on it because or her obsessive grooming.  Chances are, she was allergic to the flea bites she was getting, and it started that way, but now she just grooms all the time, and has made most of her underbelly bald.

The vet suggested we try this, so now both of our cats are being drugged.

I am not sure how I feel about that, but it's better than having to put her in an "e" collar for weeks on end.

We are also going to see if we can get an anti-itch spray recommended by a friend.  We're not convinced that she actually IS itchy, though, but figure it can't hurt to try.

Pete is still on the prozac because, when we took him off of it last year, he started grooming obsessively, and created bald spots!

He still suffers from horrible separation anxiety, poor thing, and may have to be on the prozac forever.

We tried calming cat treats, but they won't eat them.

I made my first batch of home made kahlua!  It was so easy, and it tastes pretty good!  I gave some to my friends because it makes so much.

I am going with Dave today to do his dad's grocery shopping.  I haven't gone for a couple of weeks because of that virus I had.

Now, all I have is continuing congestion.  It would be nice if that would go away, but now it's spring in Oklahoma.  Everything is blooming (several weeks early), and the pollen is high.

I've pretty much been congested since I moved down here, it's just worse than usual right now because of the virus.

Feeling better....

Well,  I had not been sick like that for many years.

I had a low grade fever for 4 days, missed 2 days of work, and had a pretty rough week, all things considered.

I never got a high enough fever for it to be a concern.  I called my doctor's office on Monday to alert them that I was on day 3 of a fever that remained steady at about 2 degrees above my normal, had a scratchy throat, slight head ache, copious (but clear) sinus congestion, tickly cough, a clogged ear, and felt exhausted.

I had to leave a voice message, like usual, and said I was not overly concerned about it, because the fever was low, and there were no body aches, chills, or nausea.

With the flu season in high gear around here, I was probably dealing with a nasty cold virus.

The nurse never called me back, so I never felt the need to go to an urgent care.  It truly just felt like something that would have to run its course.

I'm very grateful that a nagging cough never developed, because that compounds the exhaustion.

I can't remember the last time I felt ill enough to miss two days of work, but, in my work place, this bug has been going around and knocking EVERYONE out for at least two work days....so I didn't feel guilty.  Even my area supervisor left early and was off the next day at the end of the week.

I went back to work on Wednesday because there was no fever when I got up.

Of course, the fever cycled up and down several times that day, but I made it through the work day just fine.

That night, however, 4 days of fever -and not enough fluid intake- resulted in one of the worst nights of leg cramps I have ever had.

I lost count of how many small ones there were.  There was not much sleep that night.

About a half hour before the alarm, though, I had the mother of all leg cramps, where my toes were pointed AND angled out (so it was the back of my calf AND the outside of my calf all spasming at the same time).

I almost fell when I jumped out of the bed to try to stop it, because I could NOT stop it.  I could not get my heel to release to the floor to unlock the cramp.

It was intense, and long lasting.

I'm still limping, and anticipate that there will be a bruise on my leg soon, as the tissue had to have experienced trauma.

My only explanation is that I slept so much during my time sick that I was not able to keep up with fluid intake.

On Wednesday evening, I had also drank a couple of shots of whiskey to ease my throat.  It wasn't much, but on top of already being dehydrated, it was probably a bad judgement call.

Anyway, I was exhausted at work on Thursday, but I've dealt with that plenty of times in the past, and know how to cope.

It was a beautiful day, so I took two short walks on my breaks to get out into the fresh air and try to begin to regain my stamina.  (the leg didn't hurt yet)

Friday was much cooler out, so I didn't walk on my breaks, and my leg was locked up hard anyway with pain from the cramp on Wednesday night.

It was so sore, it even hurt to touch it.

I felt better in every other way, though, by Friday.

The only lingering symptom I have is copious, clear sinus discharge, and crackly ear drums.

Yesterday, we ended up spending time with friends for most of the afternoon, so today, I have a little catching up to do, but it will still be an easy day.

I have used the weekend effectively to relax and continue to regain my strength.

Hoping to get back on the workout routine starting tomorrow.

Everyone have a good week!

It was inevitable

Everyone in my area at work has been sick over the past two weeks.  Everyone.

I have been using sanitizing wipes daily on all shared surfaces (copiers, fax machine, etc), but people wandering around not covering their mouths when they cough and sneeze is not something one can keep up with by using sanitizing wipes!

I woke up overnight Friday with a fever and scratchy throat.  The fever has stayed below 100, but I feel like crap.

If the fever goes above 100, off to urgent care we go.  Yay.

My employer imposes an absurd number of restrictions on our use of our earned time off.  As a result, people HAVE to come to work when they're sick, or risk disciplinary action.

As a further result, when it's a bad cold and flu season, like this year is, everyone gets sick.

It's really counter intuitive to punish us for taking care of ourselves, but that's how it is.

Folks have been let go because they used their sick time and earned too many "occurrences."

I currently am the only person who has zero occurrences.

If I still have a fever in the morning, I will get an occurrence, because I can afford to stay home.  

The single mom who sits next to me has been hit with 5 occurrences in the past couple of months because her kids have been sick.

She got written up for excessive absences, so  SHE could NOT afford to stay home, and had to come to work sick this past week.  She was the one who got me sick in December, too, for the same reason.

The other lady, who wanders around coughing on everyone, is trying not to use her time because she has an ailing father, and could need to go to Texas to care for him at the drop of a hat.

She also has occurrences from having to do that over the holidays. If she takes another occurrence for taking care of HERSELF, her time off request to go take care of her dad could be denied.

Yes. Seriously.

So, you see, it was inevitable that I would eventually get sick.  Again.

Last winter in our office was really good. Not many people got the "crud."  This year, not so much.

The good thing is that it hit me on the weekend, so chances are, I will be in pretty good shape tomorrow.  We'll see.

It's supposed to be a cloudy, gloomy day, and that will improve my chances of being able to get some extra sleep.

I've been pretty restless the past two nights with this fever.

Nothing much else to report.

Busy week

Lots of stuff  this week.

Dave's birthday was on the 8th.  We had planned to celebrate it, along with Valentine's day, at a nice restaurant.

However, on Thursday night, we found another flea worm on Pete, so we had to re-allocate the money we had wanted to spend on a nice date to the vet bill we knew we would incur.

We thought their problem was allergies.

We've changed their food.  We've stopped using any scented detergents, softeners, and hand soaps.  We've had the air ducts cleaned.  We've done everything we know of to eliminate potential allergens....

Yet, Annabel is still grooming herself bald, and Pete has a lesser degree of over-grooming on his belly.  

It's February.  It's supposed to be winter (it was 88 degrees yesterday).  Our cats are indoor-only cats.  

They're not supposed to get fleas!

Yet, it seems, they have fleas.

This is Oklahoma, and we are surrounded by feral cats, and we haven't had much winter weather this year....so fleas are, apparently, a constant.  

Even though we see no evidence of fleas anywhere, except when Pete gets the worms that come when cats ingest flea eggs that they've groomed off of their fur.

Sigh.

We've heard that the anti-flea and tick yard spray works really well, but that you have to reapply after rain.  

We're also probably going to get some diatomaceous earth, and learn how to use it.

Anyway, we got a vet appointment for yesterday.

We got there, and a tech came out to the lobby and took the cats to the back, without us.

We looked questioningly at one another.  

After a couple of minutes, I said something to the girl behind the counter, and we realized that there was a miscommunication.  

Apparently, they thought we were just there for a tech to give the cats anti flea worm pills, as we had done in the past.  When we had done this in the past, however, we were in the treatment room with the cats.

(side note: I am an expert pill-giver when it comes to cats, and I CANNOT get either of these two cats to cooperate....this is why we take them to a pro when they have to be pilled.  Our vet doesn't charge us for this wonderful service. We only have to pay for the medication)

Unfortunately, it was too late.

They said that Pete had done fine with being taken out of his carrier and given pills without us being there to hold him.

However, it seems that Annabel, being back there without her people, had freaked ALL the way out, and would not be taken out of her carrier.

She shit all over herself, and also expressed her anal glands, so that the stink was overwhelming and nauseating.

Since they didn't know we had wanted to see a doc, to discuss what else we can do to get rid of fleas year round, and make our babies more comfortable, it was not such a good visit!  

All we can do is hope that Miss Annabel doesn't have flea worms. They said that we can bring Annabel back and they can sedate her so that she can be examined and given meds. 

I am thinking that is not likely, and I am also thinking that every trip to the vet for the rest of her life is now going to be a major undertaking.

We got them home, and released Annabel in the bathroom, in hopes that she would clean herself up.  All she did was track shit all over the bathroom and cry.  So, we let her out, and cleaned up after her for a couple of hours, while what she didn't get off of herself just dried to a crust.

There's still some on her back foot this morning.

So... they charged us for Pete's pills, and then they sold us expensive flea collars to try.  They swear that these things are extremely effective.  For $85 each, they fucking well better be!!

(Dave just looked them up on Amazon....they retail for $40 each...grrrr)

We've had to treat the cats multiple times for fleas, even though we've only ever seen one actual flea.  Maybe these collars are going to be the key to success at long last.

On Thursday, I saw the doc, and had my monthly labs and injection.  

All went well, and doc has changed my schedule to see him and get labs to every other month.  That was nice before, and I am sure glad to see it again!

On the months that I don't have to see him or get labs, all I have to go for is my injection, and that takes 5 minutes.

My right thumb continues to be completely healed after the cortisone shot in December.

My left wrist, not so much, and now the right wrist is about even with the left.  

I am thinking that the wrists will probably require surgery to go back to normal.

I am willing to give it a little more time, though.  It's only been one month since we withdrew the injected hormone blocker, and went back to the pill.

The pain varies in intensity, and sometimes, there isn't any at all.  

That can change suddenly, though, and with devastating consequences.  (sudden, sharp pain while doing normal, every day tasks... yeah.  I haven't managed to break anything yet, but HOLY SHIT, that hurts when it happens).

After my appointment, we did all of the errands because I had signed up for an on line meditation class, of sorts, that was to take place Friday night (we usually do our errands on Fridays after work).

I got all settled in to do the class, and the cable internet went out RIGHT as soon as the class started.  

This has never happened before...and the timing was beyond aggravating.

Of course, service was restored after about a half hour, but that was too late for me to jump back in and know what was going on.

Fortunately, when I paid for the class, I got access to a recording of it.  I missed the experience of taking it, live, at the same time as a thousand other people all over the world, but I can play it back and do it by myself.

Which I will probably do today.

In other news, my friend Rebecca is making me a dance costume from scratch.  I will need to have any costuming custom made for the rest of my time doing dance.

We started on the base for the costume yesterday, and I think it's going to be great!  I can't wait to see it.  

She's doing all of the shopping, and I will pay her back, and then I will give her a massage to pay her for her labor (when my wrists aren't hurting).

Our next recital is at the end of March.

We tried roasting a whole chicken on the grill yesterday. 

The weather was so hot, we didn't need the oven to be on for 2 hours.  And, gosh, I had not looked at the forecast when I planned my menu! Imagine that!

It's February, after all...it's not supposed to be almost 90 degrees.

Anyway, the bird was supposed to be spatchcocked, but Dave lost his nerve, and was not able to take the shears to the bird to open it up.  Said it gave him the willies.

We already knew I could not do it... I can't handle raw meat. It gives me the heaves.

SO....tried roasting it whole, and it didn't work.  We had to turn the oven on anyway.

That sort of just fit in with all of our other thwarted plans this week.... No date night, no meditation class, no successfully outdoor-roasted chicken.

Whatever....

Dave is going to go take care of his Dad's grocery shopping today, and, while he is gone, I will make a trip to Trader Joe's to get a few items.  The cats really like the food we're getting from there.

(Did I mention in a previous post that their regular food started making them vomit? We got a bad batch.  Dave called the company, and they sent us coupons for the same food... um... no thanks!)

I will also put on my gloves and strip the chicken carcass, make soup, and do another cooking project for tonight's dinner.

Off to the shower.  Enjoy your Sunday!