Memorial Day weekend at home this year....

This week has been much better.

It helps that the huge mess is gone, and we don't have to look at it anymore.

We counted the ring patterns in the stumps, and there were actually 18 trunks, some small, some large.

It was not just some branches down like some people might think.  It was a colossal mess.  I still don't think the pictures I posted do it justice.

I tried to plant some prairie plants in the back where the grass is dead and the ground was torn up, but something happened to a couple of the plants to crush them.  I have NO idea why a feral cat would do that...but who else has been in the yard?? No one.

That was aggravating.

I will wait now to try for flowering plants at another time, and maybe just plant some native grasses back there, if I can find any.  I also don't want to spend any more money on the yard right now!!!

It's "late" in the year to be buying plants in Oklahoma.   The garden centers empty out and close up shortly after Memorial day.

Then they re open in fall.

Maybe when we are out and about today, we will find a garden center that's open and has some native grasses.  I am willing to at least take a look at them and see how much they are.

In other news, Dave is doing a LOT better now.  He has seen the free counselor every week, and is responding well to his medication.

I, on the other hand, finally called my doctor to complain about the increase in chemo side effects over this past cycle.

I have been having much more hair loss (it's visibly thinning now, my hands are covered with hair when I shampoo), diarrhea every day of the chemo cycle, and more persistent mouth sores.

Since my last scan was good, and since the pharmacy nurse who interviews me every month keeps asking me if my dosage has been changed, I asked my doc if my dosage can be changed....

The answer was yes!  My next cycle starts next Thursday, and I will be taking a dose that has been reduced by 25 mg.

According to the pharmacy nurse, it can be reduced to half of the original dosage-- eventually.

According to my personal nurse, this is done in 25 mg steps.

My nurse said that this should relieve the daily diarrhea.

She said nothing about the hair loss or mouth sores, but I really hope to see a reduction in those as well.

Trust me, having mouth sores ALL the damn time is pretty miserable.

I can deal with being bald again (if it comes to that), but the mouth gets unbearable at times.

Everything tastes different, too, by the third week, and has barely recovered at the end of my 7 days off every month.

The mouth sores have been pretty much a regular part of this treatment for 7  months, but have gotten worse.  The diarrhea going on for more than the first week is new, and the hair loss is definitely new, over the May cycle.

The last time I saw my doc, I asked how long we would do this treatment, and he said indefinitely... until we reach a point of intolerable toxicity, or progression of the disease.

SO, coincidentally, I guess I reached the first point of toxicity, and we will try reducing the dose.

Dave finally got the full invoices for all of the repairs and tree removal, and put them all together.

JUST the electrical and tree removal was $5340.00

The window was $95.00, and the food loss was hard to calculate, but probably around $300.00 (about two weeks' worth of groceries).

He took that all to our insurance agent's office, and it was passed along to the adjuster.

Wonder of wonders, they are releasing more funds to us.  They already paid $367.00, and will be sending an additional check.

It works out to them paying our deductible.  The rest is on us.

That seems backwards to me, but what are you going to do?  The biggest expense was the removal of the trees, and that wasn't covered at all.

Dave was able to withdraw the funds from his future inheritance.  Without that, we'd be trying another on line fund raiser.

This Memorial Day weekend finds us staying home and trying to relax and regroup.

We need the down time, so I am glad we didn't plan anything in advance.  We would have had to cancel it anyway, to save money.

Wishing my friends and family in the US a good holiday weekend.  We are going to a movie today, and maybe to do a little thrift store shopping.

Gone

The trees were removed and the pile along the front curb was truly epic.

They came and got it, though....even though they did leave a colossal mess.  More work for us. Yay.

There were 10 trees that we lost.  Now the back yard is completely different.

We went out today and got some prairie plants, though, to see if they will "take" in what will be the brutal sun of Oklahoma summers.

The idea is to get some prairie grasses, too, and plant them along the fence line.  We couldn't find any that I could justify the expense of today, though.  We'll have to shop around a bit.

Today, I planted larkspur, blanket flower, echinacea, and coreopsis.   Multiple colors and heights.  It will be very pretty, if the sun doesn't kill them.  I am sure they are hybridized, so they may be weaker than their true native cousins.

Back out into the yard I go!  Have a good Sunday.

Hard work and progress

Last weekend, Dave and I worked really hard to try to clean up the yard as much as we possibly could.

I was able to get out there and mow around the fallen trees, and the enormous brush pile, yesterday.

Coordinating the professional tree service with the electric company and the neighbor took all week, but we are FINALLY scheduled for next Tuesday.

The yard will cost us $2300.00

Dave is taking the money out of his trust, which is supposed to be his inheritance when his dad passes away.  We don't really have any other choice.

This storm is costing us about $5000.00

Dave still intends to fight with the insurance company for an additional pay out, since they underestimated the electrical repair, but more money from them is not going to add up to $5000.00.

During the week last week, Dave made sure that Pop's new care givers are showing up and doing their jobs.

He also saw his temporary counselor, and his PA, and got an increase in his anti-anxiety medication.

He was able to go back to work Thursday.

Yesterday, he cut down the mulberry tree, and I helped drag it out, piece by piece, to the curb.  He worked very hard on that project.

I also vacuumed, mopped, did all the laundry, and balanced the check book.

My stamina for physical labor is definitely being impacted by the chemo pill.  I get fatigued a LOT more quickly than ever before, and I get overheated more easily as well.

Even just 6 months ago, I was capable of a LOT more.  It's frustrating.

Dave will take pictures of the tree work next week, so hopefully, I will be able to post them next weekend.

Happy Mother's Day to any out there who celebrate.

Images of the devastation

The dead branches shattered like glass.  There are sticks EVERYWHERE, making it impossible to mow without cleaning up first.

The only thing that's fixed so far is the electrical service and the cable (for internet).

You can see in that last picture where the riser was attached.  We found it 60 feet away in the back corner of the yard.

The electrical repair invoice is for over $2000.  The insurance will get a copy, and hopefully, they will increase the payment they made to us for all repairs, which was only around $300.

It's been a very rough couple of weeks.

Addendum.... we worked out in the yard all day.... made a lot of progress with our little chain saw.  One trash can is full of sticks, and there's a huge pile that needs to be moved to the curb for pick up, but it looks a LOT better.  We worked so hard, and sweated so much.... but it was worth it to not feel so much despair every time we look outside...

Week from hell, weekend in heaven...

Monday, Dave was off work to take care of his follow up and to recover from his experience in the hospital last weekend with a severe anxiety attack.

One of the things that didn't get done last weekend was his dad's groceries.

Dave's son was supposed to go do that (told me he WOULD do it, in fact), but he never did (you may recall that Dad's care giver quit suddenly due to illness a few days prior to Dave's emergency ambulance ride adventures).

That turned out to be a blessing in disguise, because when Dave went on Monday to get the groceries, his dad had fallen and cut his head open.

He was gushing blood, and there was blood all over the house from Dad walking around bleeding.

Dave called 9-1-1 and spent the day dealing with this major crisis -- right after his own crisis.

The e/r doc ordered a head CT, and everything came out okay. No internal brain bleed, no concussion.

They cleaned the wound, put 16 staples in it, and released Dad home.  The gash is 3 inches long.

Due to his age, we had hoped they would keep him overnight, but they did not, so Dave called for a non emergency transport to get Dad home.

Meantime, Dave contacted his boss and explained everything, and said he would not be at work Tuesday, either.

Dave called his eldest brother in Houston (who has power of attorney for Dad's medical and legal), who is retired, and he said he would possibly come up and help out...maybe around Friday.

So... Dave's family is a major fail in my eyes at this time!!  First, Eric doesn't do what he says he is going to do to help out, and then.....

I would have been on a plane on Monday, since my brother was already on shaky ground, and now THIS happens!!

(His brother actually went fishing the day after Dad's accident--he doesn't get in a hurry about ANYTHING, and apparently doesn't really understand what Dave had just gone through....or doesn't care.  Dave's middle brother, in Kansas, still works, so he did what he could from afar, including starting the search for a new care giver for Dad, and staying in regular phone contact.)

Dave took his dad to the doctor on Wednesday to be checked out.  He's okay.

Anyway, Dave eventually talked his brother into coming SOONER, but he did not come until Thursday, so that meant that Dave had to miss work all week.

Since he spent so much time at Dad's, making sure he was eating and taking his meds, Dave was also able to clean up most of the blood.  There's a big area on the carpet, though, that will have to either be removed or cleaned professionally.

Dad is doing okay. He gets his staples out next Wednesday, and Dave's brother will take care of it.

Friday was my birthday, which was kind of a big deal.

55 and still alive has been my theme.  Many women diagnosed with stage 4 breast cancer do not live into their third year of treatment, so I am VERY aware, and very happy to be having another birthday!

I'm not just alive, I am thriving.

In recognition of this, we booked a fully equipped, modern cabin in Broken Bow, OK (where it's green and hilly, and there's a national forest).

This was another reason we needed Dave's brother to come to town and help out with Dad.

After last weekend, and then last WEEK, we both really desperately needed this quiet, stress-free get away.  This cabin cost us $300, and was pre paid.

Rain was in the forecast, so we planned to just sit in our cabin, and read, and listen to the rain.

That is exactly what we did... in addition so using the hot tub (when it was not raining), and the tv and dvd players.  We laughed our butts off watching funny dvds.

The drive down on my birthday was beautiful, with fields of flowers, and partly sunny skies.

We got here before the rain, so we went out for dinner, and got back to the cabin and soaked in the hot tub before a drop ever fell.

There was a whip-poor-will in the woods, and we sat on the front porch swing and listened to him sing, as the wind blew through the trees.

It has been VERY therapeutic.

We are still there right now, letting the dishwasher and the laundry finish.

The bad news is, on Friday night/early Saturday morning, a MAJOR storm ripped through our home neighborhood, knocking down full grown, huge trees; limbs and branches; and the POWER.

Our neighbor lost her beautiful, enormous silver maple (thankfully it did not fall on either of hour houses), and we have been told that our back yard is a huge mess, but that none of our trees are down.  Just limbs and branches.

Our power line is on the ground in our back yard.  From what we saw on news reports, 40 thousand OG&E customers were without power at one point.

Our neighbor tells me that there's only a small area of our neighborhood that is still dark, and our house is in the middle of it.  Dave just called OG&E and there are no updates regarding the outage in our area.

Great.

It's 42 degrees in OKC this morning, and our house sitter says it's 60 degrees in the house right now.

Maybe the food in the fridge and freezers won't rot if it gets cold enough in the house.  Chances are, though, that we will have to throw everything away.

We'd been saying we needed to defrost the deep freeze.....

It's pretty cool that this cabin has a washer and dryer, so we don't have to take any dirty laundry home, since we can't wash it!!

I think MAYBE this has been enough stress and anxiety for this year.   ALL AT ONCE.  Can we stop now, please?

At least this weekend has been a lovely respite.  There were storms here last night, too, and the power flickered out a few times, but it came right back on.

Sigh.....wish we could just stay, but it's too expensive!

Have a good Sunday!

Addendum:  Our back yard is not full of branches, it is full of trees.  The power and cable lines were ripped off of the back of the house.

It was 50 degrees inside when we got home, but the temp dropped to 41 outside last night, so it is in the 40's inside this morning, to be sure.

We got a crappy motel by the highway, and had to leave the cats in the house.

I will not have to miss work (because God FORBID!), and Dave has our handy man guy coming out this morning to re-attach the electric meter and riser to the house.  Then Dave can all the electric company to turn us back on.

Emergency crews came yesterday, finally, and put the line up by the meter. It was NOT a live line, but was already shut off.

Dave called the 24 hour insurance company hotline yesterday and opened a claim.

Off to my cheap motel shower....

Rough weekend

So.

Dave's been having more problems with his anxiety lately, and had put in a call for a new doctor to help him with it.

The soonest new patient appointment he could get was at the end of June, which seems absurd to me when the new patient is in crisis mode.

Anyway, he dropped me off at work on Friday morning, and went along to his office.

A couple of hours later, he called me saying that he thought he was having another heart attack.  He had called 9-1-1, and someone would let me know where they were taking him.

Fortunately, they took him to the hospital right across the street from my office, so I did not have to have someone take me home to get my car.  I told my supervisors, and ran across the street.

LONG story short, Dave had a FULL cardio work up (including a stress test), was kept in the hospital under observation, and was declared as healthy as he can be!

He does, however, have anxiety attacks!

The last time we went to the e/r for chest pains, that was also declared non-cardiac, and purely anxiety related. That was in 2011.

Anyway.... here comes the long story.....

We waited for over six hours for them to discharge him from observation. That was absurd.  I'm documenting it all here so that we will remember everything when we get our survey from the hospital.

After his stress test came back "A+," (in the cardiologist's words to Dave in person), the nurse on shift, Angie, said that he was released by the cardiologist, and that we could get him whatever he wanted for breakfast, and that she'd be back in a bit

After he ate, he got dressed, because all of the monitors had been removed after the cardiologist declared him healthy, and he was not being treated for anything, not even having his vitals checked (after a while, anyway).

Then, maybe an hour after he ate his breakfast, the nurse came in and said that the hospitalist didn't want to release him yet, because of what the cardiologist had said.

???

What the cardiologist had said was that Dave is in practically perfect health!  He declared the event an anxiety attack, and said that the pain was chest wall pain from Dave tightening up during his panic.  The nurse herself had used the words "he's released you."

So that made ABSOLUTELY no sense. We asked for a clearer explanation, and all she said was that she would call the hospitalist and "challenge" her decision to keep Dave another night.

Dave kept going out to the nurse's station and asking what was going on.....and she just brushed him off.

She'd say she'd be in to talk to us, and then she'd sit there and chat with her friend, and never come into the room.

One of the times he went out to talk to her, she said that the hospitalist was on the unit, and would be by to see us.

I SAW the hospitalist walk by our room, and she never even looked in.

She had no intention of talking to us.

There were only 3 or 4 patients in the unit, so it wasn't like it was taking her hours and hours to make rounds.

Then she left!

It was extremely aggravating.

Dave went out to the nurse's station several times, and got nowhere.

Finally, he went out and asked where the ice machine was, and Angie FINALLY said that she was working up the discharge papers.

What, she couldn't be bothered to come in and tell us that he was being discharged?  Or WHY it had taken 6 hours?

Guess not.

When she FINALLY came in to discharge him, she was really abrupt and rude going over the discharge instructions.

I said I had a question, and she said "LET ME FINISH."

Wow.

I wonder if she got in some kind of trouble for not discharging us at 11 am, and she was taking it out on us?

We have a feeling she was the one who actually dropped the ball, because as we were leaving, she said that the hospitalist was the one who wanted to just let us leave, so her story switched completely.

If the hospitalist had wanted to keep him another night, she would have come IN to the room, instead of just walking by.

We are pretty convinced that Angie was lying to us, that SHE had made some kind of mistake, and that we were supposed to have been sent home at 11 am instead of 5:30 pm.

Anyway, Dave's son DID come to the e/r.  That was a good thing.

Then he took me home (after they moved Dave to observation), so I could get my car, and go back with Dave's med information, pajama pants, and electronics.

But he did not come back in the evening like he said he would.

Whatever, at least he showed up at the beginning (and kept in touch via text yesterday while he was at work).

Friday night, Dave insisted that I go home before it got fully dark.  We both needed to rest.

SO, I came home.... and did all of the laundry, vacuuming, cleaned the litter boxes, cleaned the bathroom, did the dishes..... I wanted all of that stuff done, so that I wouldn't have to mess with it over the weekend.

It also helped me to relax to just do normal stuff.

As it turned out, it was good that it was done, since I didn't get home until about 7 Saturday night (after going to get Dave's car so he could take it home,  I went to do half of the errands that we didn't get to do Friday night like we usually do).

Dave had some issues last night, which is understandable after everything he'd been through, but he is doing MUCH better today.

I am about to go out and start mowing the grass, and he is going to get the groceries.

He is going to take tomorrow off to follow up with the PA he normally sees, and inquire about a referral to a doctor who can help him with his anxiety NOW.

Daily Gratefuls

The morning after my first condo tenant baled on me, I was in a panic.  I thought I was going to go bankrupt and lose all of my assets.

I started a practice that morning of trying to think of three things for which I was grateful, and focus on that.

I have done that every day now for going on 6 years.  I post my Daily Gratefuls on Facebook, so that the practice is visible to myself, mostly, and to encourage others to do the same.

I have seen it become a trend across my friends network, and I have heard from my friends that they have friends who have also taken up the practice.

What makes it "mine" is the way it's done.... This morning, I am grateful for my home. I am grateful for my job...etc.

It's such a simple thing, but it really helps.  I am pleased that so many people have adopted it!

We worked hard around the yard yesterday.

Some of our tax refund money that's left (after the multiple little home improvement projects) went toward plants and soil and stuff for the yard.

I didn't do much of anything last year with planting or potting, so this year, I'd like to pick that up again.

Today, we are going to a drag show and brunch.... very traditional Easter, HAHA!

Since we aren't practicing Christians, Easter isn't really on our radar.  If there weren't stuff advertising products for the holiday, like chocolate eggs, we'd never even know it was happening.

My scans were done on Friday.  Unless there is really bad news, I will get the results when I go for my regular monthly visit to the clinic.

If there is bad news, I assume they will call me to leave work and come in right away.

That's happened a couple of times before, so I am trying not to hold my breath and anticipate it happening tomorrow or Tuesday.

That being said, however, I will not fully relax until the end of the day on Tuesday.  I figure by then, the scans will have been read, reported, and in my file. No news will be good news.

Hopefully.

Distractions are good, though, and I will have work and dance class on Monday to focus on.

I found out last week that my FMLA expired over a year ago.

A friend who is a human resources expert said that it was my employer's responsibility to inform me that my paperwork expired....but she doesn't know the people I work for.

The funniest part is that I DID EMAIL my boss  in January of last year, and asked if I was supposed to submit new paperwork.

Her exact reply was "No, you should be fine."

SO, I got new paperwork, mailed it to the doctor, and picked it up when I was at the clinic on Friday.

I will hand it in tomorrow....that way, in case I DO have to leave to go for text results with no notice, I cannot be penalized for it.

(yes, I would be penalized without FMLA papers in place.  Another funny thing is, my employer didn't know my paperwork had expired either, so when I had to leave for the bad news in Oct., it was marked down as FMLA!)

Must be getting on with my day.  To anyone who celebrates Easter, hope you have a joyous one!