Trying for normal

Today would have been Dave's mom's 83rd birthday.  Sigh.

She didn't quite make it.

We went and visited the grave last weekend, and had lunch with Mom's sister before she left to go home to Virginia this past Tuesday.

Dad was drinking heavily that day, and had passed out in his easy chair by the time we got back to the house.

This week, we have tried to just get back to normal.  Dave had thought that he would have to travel for work, but thankfully, that did not happen.

This weekend, I will cook and clean and do laundry.

There's no one staying at our house, and there's nothing else we have to do.

It's good.

Dave's dad was to take the dog for grooming this morning.  We tried to get an appointment while everyone was still in town (hoping that someone could take him, so Dad wouldn't have to), but the groomer was booked, and today was the soonest we could get.

Poor dog hasn't been groomed since before Mom got sick with her original complaint of an upper respiratory virus back at the end of June.

His nails were dangerously long, and making him walk funny, and he stank.

(he's a dachshund named Coco).

Dave called Dad last night, and said he sounded pretty good.  He said he'd take Coco this morning. Hopefully, he remembered.

I have kind of missed cooking for my in laws over the past few weekends.  It had become a sort of mission for me..to provide them with high calorie food they'd want to eat.  Mom SO needed to gain weight and eat regular meals to make her medication more effective.

But then when we saw that the last two batches of meals I had made were still in the freezer, the wind went out of that sail.

We have lots of thoughts about why the food was still there, but I'd rather not put that here in this forum.

Anyway...

I was surprised to not hear from most of my friends back home when they got the news about my mother in law.

Some  posted on face book, two sent texts, but there were no cards, no flowers, no requests to know which funeral home, or when the services would be.

I sent flowers to funeral homes twice, and cards to homes on three other occasions to friends over the past two years when they lost parents.

Not that I'm keeping score..wait...yes, I am. Who am I trying to kid?  Hah...

But sometimes, I feel like they've forgotten me entirely over the past 5 years.

Like all I am to them anymore is someone they know on facebook.

Gone are the meaningful ties I thought we still had.

I feel slighted,  you know?  This was a big deal for Dave, and for me, too, and they didn't even notice it.

And maybe it's just me being old school, but a post on facebook, or a text, does not a condolence make.

That being said, I doubly appreciate the one card that I DID get from a friend back home.  It means the world.

In other news, Peter the kitten has ring worm, and has to take medicine for FORTY FIVE DAYS.

 There's also a chance that Annabel will get it now, too, and that we humans may also find patches of it on our skin.  Yippee.

I have notified the facebook page of the shelter we got him through.  Ring worm is a highly contagious fungal infection.

I have closed the fund raiser I had set up for my friend in Illinois who is homeless and in stage 4 metastatic cancer.

People just stopped contributing.

We never even made it to $3000.00 over 4 months, but some kid who wants to learn how to make potato salad raises multiple thousands.  It's so odd to me.

The extra good news in her story is that her pro bono attorney was able to get a cash payment out of her ex husband that covered about 6 months of missed child support payments from years ago.  That money has helped get her son signed up for 2 of his missing GED classes!  Big step forward in making sure he can fend for himself when she dies.

Right now, he's 21 without a high school diploma, so he can't get a job.

Next up, the attorney is trying to get the monthly maintenance payments that are backed up for 10 years to start flowing from the ex again. Then maybe Laura won't be homeless anymore.

Our effort helped her a lot, though, and it was such a good thing while it lasted.  I am hoping someone else in her circle of friends will step up and help.

Again, it feels odd to NOT be going to the bank and the post office every weekend to send her gift cards.

Another part of getting back to normal.

We made our once a year trip to Starbucks today!  I refuse to spend $5 on coffee that tastes burned, UNLESS it's a pumpkin spice latte.  I will get ONE of those every year, on the first chilly October day...and today qualified.

It was yummy!

Off to the kitchen to start round one of this weekend's projects.  Everyone have a good weekend!