All is in place

My awesome co workers threw a luncheon party in honor of me yesterday, which was very touching.

Then, last night, a friend from the dance studio brought us a feast of roast chicken, home made mac and cheese, and salad.  Perfect, because I have not made a menu or plan for this week....I am not focusing on anything like that right now. Only on the tasks at hand.

I was able to schedule all of today off from work, and that has been a HUGE blessing.  We were up very late last night, and I had to go have preliminary tests today, so it's all worked out perfectly.

Cathy Carroll arrived from Washington state at midnight last night, and is settled in to help me deal with surgery and post surgical needs.

We were up until close to 2 am, and I was glad to be able to sleep as long as I needed to after that, instead of getting up at 5:45 and then trying to work a half day.

My support crew (Dave and Cathy) took me to the hospital today for a preliminary EKG, and for what turned out to be the sentinel node procedures.  All they told Dave was that it was a lymph node scan, so neither of us realized it was sentinel node, which  is probably GOOD, because I was dreading that, and had I known it was today, I would have been FAR more anxious.

I was under the impression it would be done pre surgically, as in while I was IN the O/R.

Sentinel node mapping is something that wasn't available even to my sister 10 or so years ago.  I am lucky that I have that extra bit of technology on my side.

They inject radioactive dye into the nipple area (which was why I was dreading it.  It was AWFUL, but I got through it way better than all of the previous needles jammed into my most sensitive bits).  I got two injections per breast.

Then you have to massage yourself every 5 minutes for the better part of an hour, and then you lie on a table and get pictures taken.  No claustrophobia-inducing tube this time, though.

This shows the surgeon the node or nodes that are first in line to take out.  It helps avoid removal of ALL of the nodes if that isn't fully necessary.  It potentially makes post op recovery a lot easier in the long term.

Then we stopped at my eye doctor's office to get my glasses fixed (they fell apart the other night....just like right before my wedding!).

Now we are home, and I can relax.  Cathy and Dave are now in charge of getting food ready, cleaning up, and whatever else needs to be done.

If it weren't so chilly out, I'd want to get in the hot tub, since it's my last chance for a good while.  Might do it anyway.  We'll see.

SO...tomorrow morning, I say good bye to my beautiful breasts.  I have no qualms about losing them.  They have served me well. They have been appreciated and loved and cared for.  Adored, even.  Sources of beauty and pleasure.

But they got a disease, and sometimes, diseases need to be cut out.  And I am asking everyone to join me in thanking them for their beauty and pleasure, and asking them to take their disease with them when they go, so that I may continue on, in perfect health, without them.

I will be flat chested now, with no intention of having reconstructive surgery done.  I'm not interested in the months it takes to accomplish, all of the adjustments and appointments and tweaking and discomfort....Just. No.

I have no idea how that will play out, but I am thinking that I am strong enough to deal.

I have been so far.

Thank you, gentle reader, for your kind support and prayers/good thoughts/good wishes.  I love each and every one of you.